Bomb Throwing Pacifist

If you took that happy, smiling guy from the box of Quaker Oats, handed him a bottle of gin and a rifle, and pissed him off to a point where he decided he wasn't going to take it anymore, you'd get a little something like this.

Thursday, April 26, 2007

Thursday Morning Comedy Hour

Things are picking up. By which of course I mean work is slowing down, thus resulting in far too much free time being wasted on writing journal entries and perusing the outer reaches of Right Blogistan. What can I say?

Anyway, today's column is from perennial favorite Erik D. Rush, Fox News' affirmative action attack candidate who despite being batshit crazy and chronically ill-informed, finds his obliviousness to his surroundings matched only by his willingness to take a hatchet to other black leaders with whom the right disagrees (in short, everyone except Clarence Thomas, Alan Keyes, Condi Rice, and the 2% or so of the black population that had a positive opinion of W. in the weeks following Hurricane Katrina).

Here goes.

The Second Most Dangerous Organization in America

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Erik Rush
March 21, 2007

While researching a story about a city council race for a local newspaper, I came across one of the most disturbing and disgusting phenomena I’ve yet seen come onto the scene in American politics.

And remember folks. This is the guy who said that, in retrospect, Pat Robertson was right in calling for the assassination of Hugo Chavez.

We all know about the parade of far-Left freaks that includes MoveOn.org, George Soros, Peter Lewis, David Geffen and their ilk, who are using their vast resources to propagandize the American public into voting us incrementally toward being a morally bankrupt, internationally castrated nation.

As I always suspected. It's not just that the Commiedhimmieliberalnazicrats want to force us into being immoral, but it's their propensity for wiener-whacking which is especially troublesome.

We’ve heard the American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU) referred to as “the most dangerous organization in America” due to its support for nearly everything evil.

Granted when you heard it, you were probably drunk off your ass in some anonymous biker bar on the other side of town, so you're reasonably sure you don't have to worry about bumping anyone who heard your subsequent 15-minute-long tirade against the ACLU and their perfidious attempts to suck away your precious bodily fluids around the office water cooler.

And yes, I realize that I am perhaps being unreasonably charitable in suggesting that Rush actually interacts with other human beings in an office-like setting, instead of occasionally hurling feces-smeared manuscripts at his handlers during his semi-annual cage cleaning. Call it artistic licence.

Well, I think I may have discovered the second most dangerous organization in America.

If you think he's referring to the KKK, Posse Comitatus, the Phineas Preisthood, the Michigan Militia, the Animal/Earth Liberation Front, or the World Church of the Creator/Creativity Movement, you would be...well..you know...


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I’m referring to the Washington-based organization Progressive Majority, a lobbying group dedicated to:

“…identifying and recruiting the best progressive leaders to run for office; coaching and supporting their candidacies by providing strategic message, campaign, and technical support; prioritizing the recruitment and election of candidates of color; and bringing new people into the political process at all levels.

In other words, the most dangerous group in America is not a group of shadowy, paranoid, armed-to-the-teeth radicals who intend, plan and execute acts of violence in the name of a murky, cult-like ideology. Nope. The "most dangerous group in America" is a liberal advocacy movement which seeks to support progressive candidates, especially those of color. Yeah, considering Rush's readership, I'd say that's about right.

“We elect progressive champions by:

▪ Identifying every electoral opportunity
▪ Recruiting the best progressive leaders to run
▪ Training candidates and staff to win
▪ Providing state of the art political support
▪ Helping them become effective leaders once elected.

“…We build locally to win nationally.”

You know, I'll say this for Osama bin Laden. While he hates democracy and all it stands for (much like Erik Rush), at least he can grasp the fundamental logic upon which the concept is built. People with different opinions on different matters come together to resolve their differences via the magic of the voting booth. For Bin Laden, Liberalism is merely the flip side of the same democratic coin- one which he wishes to see eliminated. For Erik Rush, it's a perversion of the greatest order and a threat of the largest magnitude, because both sides of the coin should (in his book anyway) say the same thing. Le plus ca change...

heir agenda – the Progressive agenda – includes well-spun catch phrases that translate into[...]

Oooh, well-spun catch phrases? Let's see if I can identify them.

socialist policies[...]

"One man, one vote!" "Votes for women!" "Equal pay for equal work!" and "Black or white, unite and fight!"

unfettered abortion[...]

"Out, out! Vile blastocyst!"

open borders[...]

"iViva la Raza!"

affirmative action on methamphetamine[...]

Um, this one is just wierd. I think it's a transcription error.

economy-stultifying environmentalist zealotry[...]

Boy, that's a mouthful. Um, "Save the Whales!"?

and more pliant, radical Cynthia McKinney and Charlie Rangel types in Congress.

Hey, wait a minute. There are no wel-spun catch phrases that translate into McKinney and Rangel. What kinda stunt are you trying to pull here, Rangel? But while we're at it, uh..."Vote McKinney, she's phat, not skinny!"

Their president, Gloria Totten, “has worked for progressive causes"[...] and is also President of the Board of the Ballot Initiative Strategy Center – all far-Left political advocacy outfits.

Hah! You see? That's the thing about liberals. Oh sure, they claim they're all inclusive, but check it out: their president is a screaming liberal! What more proof do you need?

When you cut through Progressive Majority’s Coke commercial website and the altruistic claptrap, what you have is an organization dedicated to the stealth placement of “acceptable” candidates throughout a sleeping citizenry – at every level of government.

Holy shit. I think Erik's about to blow this case wide open. That despite claiming to be a liberal group dedicated to the advancement of progressive campaigns and candidates, they are in fact dedicated to the "stealth" placement of candidates throughout a sleeping citizenry, presumably by using their mass-hypnotic mind-control antenna located deep within the Washington forests.

The most concerning (and convicting) of Progressive Majority’s promises is that of helping candidates “become effective leaders once elected”, essentially confirming said candidates as their agents. These candidates of course generally disavow any significant entanglement or identification with the organization, citing the “plausible deniability” of 527-like tax-exempt advocacy groups and PACs.

If this is sounding more than a little alarmist or conspiratorial to you, it's because it is. In addition to claiming that Pat Robertson was right in calling for the assassination of Hugo Chavez, Erik Rush also claimed that Barack Obama's church was essentially a cult-like front for a black supremacist agenda- evidence he uncovered while pounding the cyber pavement and interviewing cyber witnesses like the good cyber journalist he is...by spending 15 minutes in front of Google.

Perhaps what troubled Erik Rush the most about Barack Obama's church was its 10-point "Black Value system," which included such items as "A Commitment to the Black Community" and "A Commitment to the Black Work Ethic." Then again, given Rush's own status as Fox News' token go-to guy whenever a minority candidate needs to be criticized, I can see why this would be troubling to him.
Americans need to recognize what a dangerous precedent this is, and what politics has become in America.

Grass-roots groups organizing to advance their political causes. Truly, not even in the darkest days of WWII did the Nazis present such an insiduous threat to our freedom.

Turning over local government to operatives for national lobbyists – of any political stripe – poses the specter of a government in which the individual’s vote is effectively nullified. According to Progressive Majority’s stated mission, Americans from local to national levels will be governed by agenda-driven lobbyists in Washington, D.C. rather than locally concerned members of their communities.

Because if there's one thing we know about local politics, its that it has nothing to do with party affiliation, nor the currents emanating from Washington. Besides, there are 3077 counties and parishes in the United States. If you are honestly worried that the race for neighborhood dog catcher is being controlled by a shadowy (non-profit) cartel in Washington, well, it's time to call the pharmacy and have your prescription renewed.

Hey Erik, want to worry about something useful for a change? How about the fact that 80 to 90% of American news media (and virtually 100% of all TV news media) is owned by a handful of for-profit corporations who effectively filter and control what is and is not reported? Or the fact that Regent Law School, founded by Pat Robertson and only accredited by the American Bar Association in 1996 has had over 150 alumni hired for federal government positions in the Bush Administration since 2001? Or that Exxon Mobile recently offered up to $10,000 to individual scientists and economists in exchange for their disavowal of Global Warming? Those items seem far more troubling with regards to the hijacking of political discourse in this nation than the fear that a non-profit, grassroots group says in their statement of purpose that they plan on identifying progressive candidates for every race out there. But then again, I've never been on Fox News.

It is time to step up our engagement in the Culture War.

I personally plan on filling an oil drum with styrofoam and setting it on fire. You know, because global warming is bunk and because I can.

Make no mistake: This brand of Progressives aren’t ‘Sixties liberals or misled Left-leaning Democrats[...]


You read that right, ladies and gentlemen. Today's liberals are officially worse than the Dirty Hippies(tm) of the 1960s...

they are amoral socialists who intend to transform America into a cross between Amsterdam and San Francisco.

It will be like Bullet. Only the gays will probably force each other to get pregnant every once in a while just so they can keep the great tradition of unfettered abortion alive. And they'll all be speaking Dutch.

What I want to know is: Haven’t we seen enough of the Progressive movement’s results to know that their agenda is social and national suicide?

It's kind of hard to be lecturing others on the agenda of social and national suicide when you're starting a $9 trillion deficit in the face, Erik. Not to mention or or two other items...

The “progress” they’ve advocated over the last 40 years has been the direct cause of[...]

Oh boy, here we go again. Another game of charades. But after this, you need to put the word processor away Erik, and get to work on your homework, ok? A deal is a deal.

the culture of dependency and mediocrity amongst poor and minority individuals,

Social Security, Medicare, Medicaid, and all the other programs that help ensure we don't have thousands of people living in shacks and starving to death in public parks.

the dissolution of the American family,

Umm...legalized divorce? The Eisenhower administration? Satanism?

an industry of black market fetus parts,

Definitely Satanism here.

widespread moral ambivalence, early sexualization of children, an epidemic of child rape (and occasionally murder),

But it's so fun when we do it on the X-Box (especially once you have that bootleg "Child Rape and Murder Patch" uploaded and installed off the internet)

nascent religious persecution,

I.e. Churches can't tell you how to vote without risking their tax-exempt status

weak foreign policies which served to embolden our enemies,

Like the Camp David Accords, authorizing the capture of assassination of Osama bin Laden, or the intervention in the Balkans and Kosovo

and apathetic or even disdainful attitudes amongst Americans toward our sovereignty and the nation itself.

Liberal Democrat (LIB-ur-ul dem-O-krat), n.: Someone who hates freedom, the nation-state, Jesus, and possibly fetuses (unless sold on the black market).

The choice: Americans, and Conservatives in particular can wake up and vigorously counter this blight, or we can start considering where we’re going to put our red light districts and when we’ll celebrate Gay Porn Day, which was recently signed onto the books in San Francisco.

A Gay Porn Day? Those fuckers get to have all the fun. It's discrimination I tell you! I'll tell you one thing though, pal. You may have your Gay Porn Day, but us heterosexuals have us a Straight Porn Week. It's called Spring Break and it's coming to a city near you (assuming you live in LA, Miami, Daytona Beach, and Mexico).

In any case, congratulations Erik Rush. You have done it again. You have taken a boring, ordinary Thursday and filled it up to the brim with the best, most-godawfully brilliant insanity this side of a David Lynch acid trip. I salute you!

Join us next week for Erik's most explosive, insightful and provocative column yet, "The Most Obscene Person in the Nation," in which he identifies the driver of a green 1998 Subaru Forrester with a "Buck Fush" bumper sticker as the vilest, most profane peddler of filth in the Western Hemisphere.

I'm out.

Update

HOLY SHIT! This guy has a book out in which he actually claims the best way to solve America's illegal immigration problem is to annex Mexico. Hey Erik, I got a tiny little problem for ya. Latin America doesn't stop with Mexico. Nope, it goes all the way down until you hit England. Typical, Erik. You're a good guy, but your ideas just aren't BIG enough!


I know what my next Amazon purchase will be...


Marc with a C, 1:20 PM

1 Comments:

Good words.
Anonymous Natasha, at 1:04 PM  

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