Bomb Throwing Pacifist

If you took that happy, smiling guy from the box of Quaker Oats, handed him a bottle of gin and a rifle, and pissed him off to a point where he decided he wasn't going to take it anymore, you'd get a little something like this.

Thursday, July 20, 2006

An Important Announcement

Breaking News!

Authorities have recently announced that the body of Jimmy Hoffa, once president of the teamster's union, has been found in buried in a plastic bag in the basement of an Arlington, Virginia home. Hoffa, who was last seen alive on the 30th of July, 1975, was presumed to have been murdered on the orders of Frank Fitzsimmons, his longtime teamster subordinate with suspected mafia connections. Details to follow.


We have just recieved word that Jimmy Hoffa's body has not, in fact, been found in the basement of a suburban Washington D.C. home. Apparently the item which was recovered from the scene was in fact my digital camera. The close physical resemblance between the two, coupled with the eagerness of the writer in question to come up with a piece of breaking news resulted in a premature identification of the body.

While this mistake is regretable, the editors wish to emphasize their continued comittment to quality reporting and investigative journalism. We also ask that you respect the privacy of the Hoffa family and keep them in your thoughts and prayers in what must be a very difficult time.

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Marc with a C, 10:49 AM


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